> I maintain over 200 open source projects
That’s just a little bit beyond what the average open source maintainer has on their plate.
Regardless, the attitude of recommending that people fork a project if they really need something is the way to go. It’s okay to say “no” to an influx of requests and demands. The maintainers who burn out the fastest are the ones who view every comment, suggestion, request, or piece of feedback as equally important. It’s okay to let something be your personal project and not let the community take a sort of control over your time.
Do it long enough and you will develop a thick skin, if only out of necessity. Open source will expose you to some of the nicest, smartest, most thoughtful people you’ve ever worked with. It will also expose you to some of the most demanding, manipulative people who will use every social pressure technique they know to try to make you feel bad about not doing exactly what they want.
It seems like the Open Source ethos also could also use some additions like:
1. How to maintain a healthy approach to your popular code.
2. How / why to say no without looking like the jerk.
3. How to find / manage help when you need it.
Handy skills for life too...
Granted plenty of folks do it very well, but there's nothing about Open Source that necessarily provides any of that and some folks who love to help, share, and solve problems fall into bad places.
That also leads me to wonder how much complexity for most projects is even needed. I kinda wonder if for most projects maybe 90% of the people using the code use it for a handful of tasks, and yet the vocal loud folks demanding more are a very small minority...
I made a point of setting it up right from the beginning. Easy build system, fully unit tested, code of conduct, automated CLA signing, examples, good documentation and most importantly, I am excessively kind to anyone who comments or gives feedback. This took an inordinate amount of time up front, but was worth it.
I'd say the result of this is that I've gotten a couple high quality contributions, zero stress and very very little feedback. It has been a pleasure to maintain this project because it causes me no pain at all.
I'd say that maintaining 200+ projects is just insane really. You've overdone it. It is impossible to do any of them extremely well and of course you're just going to invite 200x more drama. Don't do that.