My experience doing perf optimizations in real world systems with many many people writing code to the same app is a lot of inefficiencies happen due to over fetching data, inefficiencies caused by naively using the ORM without understanding the underlying cost of the query, and lack of actual profiling to find where the actual bottlenecks are (usually people writing dumb code without realizing it's expensive).

Sure, the framework matters at very large scale and the benefits from optimizing the framework become large when you're doing millions of requests a second over many thousands of servers because it can help reduce baseline cost of running the service.

But I agree with the author's main point which seems to be that framework performance is pretty meaningless when comparing frameworks if you're just starting on a new project. Focus on making a product people wanna actually use first. If you're lucky enough to get to scale you can work about optimizing it then.

I increasingly lean towards plain SQL over ORMs. It requires greater familiarity with SQL but I prefer that over greater familiarity with ORM-specific syntax that doesn’t translate across frameworks or languages. In addition, you can prototype new queries and profile existing queries in the database and copy-paste directly into your code.