It seems contradictory to me that author learned to "deliberately assess cutting edge technologies, bias towards conservative choices," yet he regrets not using react-native-web and Next.js.

Wait until the author hears about react-native-web-native, the go-to solution for using your react-native-web components in a native environment!

I honestly can't tell from your comment if that really exists or is satire.

Neither can I. I'm I'm leaning towards it existing but being used as a vehicle of satire, because that's just how crazy the world is now.