Every time there's something that comes up for C++ I get excited, I've always wanted to use the language, but it's like tap dancing in a mine field.

C++ needs a linter that rejects code that doesn't meet a certain standard ala Rubocop.

C++ has that. Check out clang_tidy [1].

EDIT: In particular, the clang tidy linter has a way of checking your code against the C++ core guidelines [2], which is a set of modern best practices for the language.

[1]. http://clang.llvm.org/extra/clang-tidy/

[2]. https://github.com/isocpp/CppCoreGuidelines